For many people, adoption is a wonderful way to have a child and start a family. Although not an easy decision for the birth mother or the adoptive parents, with the assistance of a reputable adoption agency and facilitator, good matches can be made and the adoption process successful and with little stress. In addition to agencies, adoptive parents can also find children independently through local newspaper advertisements or on the internet through various registry services.
Take the online option for example. With this, if you were interested in adopting, you would have the possibility of viewing profiles to include in-depth details about both birth mother, possibly birth father, and the baby if born, along with photographs. However, this type of service also benefits the birth mother and/or father in that they too can view potential parents for the baby. Once a connection is made, initial communication would take place via email, phone, or letters, allowing each party to share information or ask questions.
If the two parties believe there is a potential match, a meeting would be scheduled to meet in person. The thing to remember is that most adoption processes, even those done independently go very well. Unfortunately, as with many things, there is a slight risk, especially when using the internet to look for a baby in which a woman may pretend to be pregnant just to get the money. You see, many adoptions for pregnant women will involve her living expenses being paid until the baby is born, on top of a large fee that generally starts around $10,000.
Keep in mind that if you are interested in adopting, use good, common sense. In other words, pay attention to things said, follow up on information provided, and if at any time your gut instinct says something is not quite right, listen. In fact, even if you choose an independent adoption, we still strongly recommend you have an adoption attorney to assist. In this case, the attorney would be responsible for doing some research, drawing up legal papers, handling the money, and so on.
Two of the most common signs associated with adoption fraud are pressure and guilt from the birth mother and/or father. In other words, if you start being pressured for more money, or the birth mother/father begins to put a guilt trip on you for money, food, clothing, and other items beyond the agreement, you should take this as a red flag. Additionally, the birth mother should always be willing to release medical information to you and answer any questions you might have. If this information is held back, you should wonder why.
Other warning signs would include the birth mother/father living in motels or being transients, the mother refusing to accept medical care, and a birth mother/father not providing you with a phone number and address where she/he can be reached. Again, most adoption processes go smoothly, connecting a birth mother with adoptive parents who will love and cherish the child. However, the more you can learn about the adoption process and meet with other parents in your same situation the more empowered you become to ensure you do not become involved with fraud,as well as a broken heart.