Is shyness confused with arogance? Sometimes. But how to prevent this?
Some people advise the shy person to confess that she is shy. To keep people from seeing her as cold and aloof, a case of shyness confused with arogance, she is advised to admit her shyness. Perhaps she might say something like “parties like this really make me feel nervous.”
This may indeed bring about greater understanding. On the other hand, the other person may say something like “yes, parties like this make me feel nervous too. Well, I guess I will get some more of the onion dip. It was nice talking to you.” Confessing that you are shy should not take the place of actively doing your best to be more outgoing.
Shy people often do not contribute enough to the conversation. While this could make them appear to be better listeners, it can also be shyness confused with arogance, or at least aloofness or disinterest. The best way to show someone that you are listening is to show an interest in what they are saying, ask appropriate questions, rephrase what they say, and share interesting experiences of your own that relate to the topic under discussion.
How should shy people deal with other people who seem unfriendly? Perhaps they aren’t actually arrogant at all. Perhaps it is a case of shyness confuse with arogance! That is, Perhaps they are also shy!
On the other hand, some people may feel they already have so many friends that they don’t need to be particularly friendly or receptive to making new ones. Unfortunately, it’s difficult to know when somebody is shy or when He or she simply isn’t interested in making conversation.
Perhaps the best rule of thumb is to simply try your best to make conversation with everybody. If somebody seems particularly unreceptive, simply shrug your shoulders and move on to somebody else.
Making friends is largely a numbers game. The more people you strike up a conversation with the better your chances of success.