From time immemorial, women have always been seen as the weaker sex. So they have always been treated with kid gloves by the society. In marriage and relationships, when the cookie crumbles, men are blamed for it. In divorce cases, men are the fall guys and are made to pay alimonies.
But women are not always the saints we are made to believe they are. And men aren?t the only ones who betray their marriage vows.
Women are gaining popularity when it comes to adultery. If you think it’s just the rich and famous that stray when it comes to infidelity, then you are mistaken. That woman living next door or sitting at the next desk in the office not only may betray her marriage vows, but she may also feel comfortable enough to talk about it on talk shows like Jenny Jones, Jerry Springer or in magazine articles.
However, we should hand it to the women. They rarely cheat when they are in a fulfilled relationship. In fact, the golden rule for women universally is- make and keep her happy and anything you desire from her is yours.
So, why does an otherwise faithful wife turn into an adulterous loose cannon?
The case of the two women to be described shortly should be food for thought for men-
The first woman said she was cheating on her husband because she needed more attention than he gave her. She said her husband?s job required that he does a lot of traveling, but she had no problem with that because she could deal with the loneliness.
But what she couldn’t deal with was his lack of attention when he finally arrived from his traveling.
The second woman, whose marriage ended when her husband found out she was cheating, said she cheated for the same reason (lack of attention at home) and… wait for it… might do it again if her current husband stops being attentive.
In the book “Midnight of Confessions: True Stories of Adultery”, many women justified their extra marital affairs because they said something was lacking in their marriages- or more specifically- something was lacking in their relationships with their husbands.
Rather than try to “fix” the relationship, they choose to find someone else to provide what they considered lacking in their husbands.
Virtually everyday we see or read about women how say they are married but are fantasizing about someone else. Sometimes they are already involved with another person but feel guilty because they say they love their husbands.
Some wives cheat because their husbands cheated on them first. They justify their actions because they wanted their husbands to feel the same pain of betrayal they felt. Others say they cheat too to show their husbands that they too can be desirable to other men.
Susan Shapiro Barash, in her book “A passion for more” tries to provide an insight into why women tread this ignominious path. She writes: “Women of today, as a result of the women’s movement as well as the dynamics of women in the workplace, have a heightened self awareness. Their exposure to men, their access to men is different than in the past”.
My opinion on this is that women who betray their marital vows do it because they are focused on the thrill of the moment and don?t think about the long term effects of their actions.
Furthermore, cheating women consider themselves impervious to the fallout. To me, this is foolish… as believing that a leap from the Empire State Building won’t have devastating consequences!
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