Lets face it, when if comes to confidence no one is perfect. But it seems to me like one of the biggest factors in having high levels of self confidence comes from knowing exactly what you want out of life. I mean think about it, when you are not very sure about what you want, where you are going, or what kind of results you would like to achieve. That leads to a fair amount of uncertainty which can be a total killer of confidence. That is why certainty is the first key; it is because it is so important. Your action activity for this first key is to set some time aside and really focus on what you want out of life, where you want your life to go, and what kind of experiences you would like to have and make sure to be a detailed imaginative as you can. You will see your confidence level rise; because you will be completely aware of how you want to walk through life.
Now when I speak of fearlessness I am not talking about having a total absence of fear. I am talk about your association to fear. Many of us live far below our potential; and it has nothing to do what what they are capable of, or their intelligence. It is more often because they are afraid they might fail, and experience pain. Yet the psychology of someone who has a great level of confidence does not see failure as something that is negative or to be feared. Ask your self this question right now. Am I willing to learn from my mistakes? True confidence comes from the ability to make mistakes, learn from them and use what you learned to take a better action next time. So go out and make some mistakes!
Have you ever been looking for something and not been able to find it, and become upset and annoyed because you know this thing you are looking was “Right there!!” just two minutes ago? Just to have someone else point the thing out right in front of your nose? It is no different when it comes to confidence, when we get into a negative state of mind it is easy to ride it further and further down. Yet the whole time there is our confidence, our power, right next to us the whole time. So now it is time to become aware of the fact that we choose our thoughts and that confidence can be ours at any moment as long as we just make a strong decision to take a step back, take a deep breath, and reset our thoughts. Action step? Work on being aware of when your confidence starts to flounder, and ask your self some empowering questions like, How in this moment do I have power? Or what would it take for me to have more confidence right now?
4. Self Talk
The next key goes hand in hand with the one before it. Along with being aware of your confidence when it starts to slip, being aware of your own self talk. That is the way you communicate with your self. Sadly people tend to be very negative in how and what they think. They ask questions to themselves that require a negative answer. Like I always say your brain is like a machine, it has no bias what ever you put in is what you get out. So make a point of only asking questions or making statements that are positive. Rather then constantly getting information that makes it difficult to be positive, you will be receiving information that gives you power and builds you up, and naturally you’re confidence will boost. The homework for this one is to take complete ownership of your thoughts, remember you are the boss! If there are thoughts going on in your mind that do not support you, instantly make a statement that is the opposite. You will be blown away by the effects!
In this day and age of instant Email, instant messages, I want it now, give it to me now. It can be difficult to have to have patience. No one wants to do the work, but we all want the benefits. Often times it is the very thing that people do not want to do, the thing they wont do, that is exactly what the need to do. How many of us do not exercise? How many of us to not deepen our relationships when we know we should? My point is, there is not quick fix the only way you can have substantial results is to practice, practice, practice. Make confidence something you are fully committed to, use these tools everyday, make them a part of who you are. This change in your belief and how you construct your thoughts will lead to a shift in your life that will knock you off your socks! Guaranteed!
Disclaimer: If you follow the 5 Keys to Unstoppable Confidence with passion and determination you may encounter the following side effects: Abnormal Joy, decreased stress, problems complaining, lack of nervousness, increased sex drive, feeling empowered upon arising from a sitting or lying position, racing heartbeat, manic intensity,