Are you always finding yourself feeling helpless? Have you tried every possible way to fix your problems yet found that there was no way out? Do you think that you are a helpless person? If you have experienced these feelings before, then I am sorry to tell you that you have been fooled; you werent born helpless, you just learned how to become helpless.
An experiment was carried out on a number of dogs by subjecting them to electric shocks while providing them with a switch that they can use to stop the electric current from flowing into their bodies. For a few of the test animals, the switch were disabled so as not to turn off even when pushed. After the experiment, some of the dogs who werent able to stop the electric current developed symptoms that are similar to clinical depression; or to put it in another way: these dogs learned how to be helpless.
You Werent Born Helpless
Have you ever tried to notice how a small child tries over and over to do the same thing without getting bored? Have you ever met a person who cant walk now because, as a kid, he gave up on trying to stand up and walk after a few unsuccessful tries? Of course not! Why dont these kids stop trying and why do adults stop? Because through their life’s experience, some adults tend to develop a new ability: the ability to feel helpless!!
How Did I Learn to Become Helpless?
I have met many people who used to recover from setbacks within a few days, only to find them become totally helpless and depressed a few years later. When I talked to one of them, I discovered that he was totally convinced that there was no way out of his problems and that he was really beaten this time. But what happened? How did these warriors come to lose the strength and resilience? This is what happened to them:
* Learned Helplessness and Being Helpless: If you faced a big problem in your life, you are likely to take one of these actions: 1) keep trying until you solve it
2) keep trying while gradually losing hope, 3) lose hope and stop trying. If you did the second or the third action then you are more likely to learn how to become a helpless person. You prevent this from happening by never quitting anything midway unless you have no other option. The more you quit, the more you will record new failures in your history and the more likely you will learn how to become helpless.
* Learned Helplessness and Subconscious Mind Programming:At the time of crisis you may become highly sensitive and receptive to critical comments that you recieve from the people surrounding you, if your friends were helpless too they will keep transferring their experience to you until you will learn how to become helpless. The solution is simple, try to choose successful friends, I know that this may be something that is out of control but at least put this new parameter into consideration while expanding your relations.
* Media and Learned Helplessness: The song My Immortal is considered a perfect example for teaching you how to become helpless; the choice of words simply programs you to learn how to be broken. Dont underestimate the effect of the music you listen to on your personality; its impact is far more extensive than you could imagine.
Learned Depression and Learned Helplessness
Just as helplessness can be learned, depression can be learned too simply because in many cases depression is nothing more than being convinced that you are helpless. This emotional pain you are currently experiencing as a result of your depression may be nothing more than a false belief about your ability to take action!!
Dont let life fool you; dont learn how to become helpless because you have failed once or twice. Whatever the situation you are facing, force your way out without feeling helpless, and whenever you feel like giving up and conceding defeat, just remind yourself of the fact that helplessness is learned and that its not something that you were born with. Remember, just as you learned helplessness by practicing it, you can unlearn it by not practicing it.