I used to sit and cry because I couldn’t keep up with everything I was supposed to do as a wife, mother and working woman.
I would actually get so frustrated by my inability to “do it all” I would be unable to do anything at all. I would freeze, be unable to move, and then feel like a failure.
As sorry as it sounds, I’m not kidding. I made myself miserable because I thought I should be doing so much more. Not only that, I thought I needed to do everything I did “just right”.
I expect more women relate to this “perfection paralysis” than men, but I have known a fair number of men that suffer from it too.
Perfection Paralysis, as I define it, is what happens when your personal expectations are so great you get stuck because you can’t seem to figure out how to do what it takes to meet your expectations.
For example, there are no answers to be found on how to easily cook a beautiful and delicious Food Network-type meal for 10 while cleaning your house until it shines the day before you leave for a week long business trip.
Nope. I never found the how-to manual for juggling it all easily and beautifully, but I did find something better.
I discovered two words that saved me and they’ll save you too.
When I began using those two words in my life and career it was as if the weight of the world was lifted from my worried shoulders.
Now I know that “good enough” isn’t always actually good enough, especially if you’re an airplane mechanic, heart surgeon or Martha. But for day-to-day living, and even for a fair amount of day-to-day business activities, good enough, is good enough.
Think about it, good enough doesn’t mean “less than”. It also doesn’t mean haphazard, lazy, or irresponsible.
“Good enough” means you have worked carefully to create an outcome and with a good dose of common sense and self-confidence are able to see that your best really is good enough and no more is needed to make it better.
Most of us who suffer from the need to do things “perfect” probably had a mother and/or father that expected perfection in some area of life. It could also be other adults in your life, like teachers and team coaches, expected perfect behavior and/or perfect performance.
In any event, perfectionism is often a trait passed down through the generations. It is closely tied to the belief you can control things down to the finest details. There are many reasons for it but it doesn’t need to rule your life. Not anymore.
Two powerful words: good and enough, have the power to make you feel better, relax and enjoy life more. You may not be living a “perfect life”, but then, who does?
Consider declaring the following:
I am GOOD
I am ENOUGH
I am GOOD ENOUGH!
Copyright (c) 2007 Cari Vollmer