How committed are you to fulfilling and achieving big things in your life? A lot of you say you are 100% committed but really only give maybe 30%. In the past I have said I was committed to something but my actions were not consistent with what I was saying I was committed to. I can remember saying I wanted a full practice but doing very little to market my services. I also remember saying I wanted to be wealthy and save money but I was not committed to being responsible for changing my financial situation. Can you see where in your life you have been like this?
I am not beating myself up or any of you for not being fully committed to your dreams and goals. In fact, when my clients see where they were not fully committed and say things like “I know I should do”, I insistently cringe because that is not at all what my work is about. I do not believe that saying things to yourself like “I should do” or beating yourself up will get you dramatic results. If anything it gets in the way and dis-empowers you. What this work is about, is getting you to be honest with yourself about what doesn’t work in your life and empowering you to find ways to make your life work. Honestly, not fully committing to your goals and only giving 30% just does not work. What can you do about it?
First, examine what is going in your mind. When you commit to something big does your mind usually perceive it as a big responsibility and sacrifice? If I do this then I have to give up that? That maybe true, but what will you have to give up? Being irresponsible, wasting time, not feeling inspired and fulfilled, that seems like good baggage to lose. Your mind may tell you will have to sacrifice time, like being with your loved ones or doing your favorite hobbies. But what actually happens when you do fully commit and follow through is that you start to enjoy and get more satisfaction out of the time you spend with loved ones and doing your favorite hobbies. Why, because when you commit and participate fully in doing the big things in your life that inspire and drive you, your experience of life is more satisfying and fulfilling.
I have also noticed that many people feel overwhelmed and burden by committing to big goals. This may not be true for all of you but for many, you have an expectation that it will require a lot of work and it’s a commitment for life. So you may think to yourself that you do not have enough time or energy to do what it takes. I know for me, fully committing to big things in my life was a battle. I hated to commit because I felt stuck and It felt like a prison sentence. I always feared I would not love what I was committing to and end up feeling miserable. So I never would commit to things or I would say that I was but in my mind I always had one foot out the door just in case.
Now I have given myself the freedom and flexibility to stop doing something when I no longer feel inspired and passionate about it. What I have found is that my level of participation has greatly increased as a result of shifting my view. I tell many of my clients who are looking to transition to a new career to only think in terms of what they want to do for the next 2-5 years. When that times passes they can re-evaluate if they still feel inspired to continue on that path. The truth is we change so our interests and passions change and we have to be willing to be flexible. Now I know longer see commitments as a prison sentence because I give myself the option to stop when it is no longer rewarding.
When I gave up using excuses like, it will be too much work or what if I don’t like it, my energy and productivity increased. This is also true for my clients, when they fully commit to what they say they want to do and become unreasonable all areas of their lives start to see dramatic results such as: finances, relationships, career, health and wellbeing. What else do you think transforms as a result? You got it, their self-confidence they feel empowered and unstoppable. Clients also find that once they commit to doing big things in their life they do not have to do more but rather they spend their time doing more focused things that produce dramatic and meaningful results
We have all been around people who are doing big things in the world and we see their passion and drive and admire it. They usually have a lot of energy and always give 100%. If you are like me you may have even said to yourself “I want to be like them” or “I want to do what they are doing”. The questions to ask yourself are, do you want to be a person who is passionate and committed? Or a person who wishes and wonders how to be passion and committed?
It’s ok if up to this point you have not been fully committed and responsible for what you said you were committed to in your life. Just be honest with yourself and see where you have been out of integrity. See what excuses you were letting get in your way, and re-commit to the things in your life that inspires you. You may fall out of your commitments from time to time, most of do but pick yourself up and get back in the game.
Your assignment this week: Be honest and identify where you have not been fully committed in an area of your life. Maybe it’s a relationship, career, finances, or your health? Give yourself a percentage of how much you have been giving, maybe its only 20% or 40%. Now imagine how you would be if you were giving 100%. How would you be different? What would you be doing and saying to others if you were 100% committed? What type of results would you start to see in your life as a consequence of giving 100%. Start doing and being what you saw for yourself as being 100% committed. If you forget at times or fall astray re-commit.
Copyright (c) 2007 Melisa Milonas LLC