Some bosses are quite skilled at psyching an employee into doubting the value of his or her contribution to the organization.
An example of this is the president of a company who recently tried to show up his sales director by taking over a sales meeting in an effort to prove to everyone present that he, the president of the company, could do a better job.
There are bosses who will publically insult an employee in a leadership position to achieve the same result.
One obvious motivation behind doing this is to discourage the employee from asking for or expecting a raise in pay.
This tactic can also be used to subtly manipulate an employee into accepting a cut in pay or into submitting to additional work-demands without additional compensation.
A more personal motivation comes down to sheer, dysfunctional egotism rooted in an unconscious inferiority complex. It may feed the bosss insecure craving for a sense of power, superiority and worth to make you feel fearfully dependent upon his or her discretion.
The point is that moment you become caught up in proving yourself you stop really being yourself and begin over-extending and disrespecting yourself.
Employees who complain that their bosses are just too hard to please are often just falling for the ruse their boss is using to manipulate them into giving more and accepting less, including giving that boss more power over them than is really necessary or in their best interest.
When you feel afraid or even mildly anxious about your bosss evaluation of your contribution, you give up your power to determine your own destiny.
Remember that no one hires you unless YOU make that happen.
The reality is that the only one who really has to believe in what you have to offer is YOU.
You will always reap what you sow. Your results in life depend upon what YOU say, think, feel and do, not upon what another says, thinks or does.
This does not mean that the interests and opinions of others do not matter. It means that your concept of yourself is a critical cause of how well you do and of how others see and relate with you.
When you worry about pleasing your boss you are distracted from making a REAL contribution, which not only lowers the real value of your work; it also makes your work unfulfilling.
You werent hired to please your boss, even if your boss seems to try very hard to make you think that you were.
You were hired to do your best work in line with the aims of the organization.
As long as that remains your primary focus and intention you are acting in real integrity, which ultimately brings true honor to yourself.
Beyond this, self-confidence is one of the pillars that uphold competence. You have to feel secure about yourself to do your best work, to make the best decisions, to access your highest level of creativity and problem-solving ability.
Some bosses will go to great lengths to keep you guessing about their actual view of you as a sort of test to see how strong and capable you really are.
If you maintain your commitment to giving your best work without worrying about what your boss is up to, you may actually impress your boss with the strength of your character and be perceived as dependable instead of as dependent.
As you practice feeling, thinking and acting authentically self-assured, you radiate a quality of personal power that inspires others to feel secure about you, demonstrate your highest ability and prove your true worth to the organization.