The British newspapers and media have spotlighted the topic of misbehaving children in school recently. The topic of discussion usually ends with the answer that entails kicking troublemakers out of the classroom setting.
This time, however, the latest spin on this is to make the parents stay at home to look after them, once they have been thrown out of school.
This doesn’t make any sense and is a nuisance to parents. The discussion also describes letting special schools stay open or even building new special schools for these children.
The child has been kicked out of the regular classroom which demonstrates that they are having a tough time fitting in with the usual student setting. Then the solution must include finding an educational setting where the students can actually thrive, right?
So, if your child has been kicked out for bad behavior, what do you do? Here are my thoughts on it, having been through it ourselves with our eldest:
1. You have not failed as a parent. Don’t waste time having a pity party for yourself. Perhaps your parenting skills could use some improvement, but that is the case for just about everyone. Try to be a better parent by actively seeking out information through books and materials on raising kids.
2. DO NOT sit around blaming the school. Even if they are useless, the most likely reason is their own lack of resources (blame the education aurthority, blame the government, blame the voters). The teachers may not be able to help your child, but that reflects a lack of training and lack of time, not a lack of concern.
3. Ask for help from the local education authority (LEA). They should be able to supply an alternative learning setting for your child. You need to be persistent when you contact them, but avoid being mean. You can ask your politicians and newspapers to help you get the engine humming if you need to.
4. DO be prepared to consider alternative placements, such as special schools or even residential placements. Better to deal with it now, than to have your child growing up with the bad behaviors!
5. Seek professionals to determine if your child has a learning disability, ADHD or Asperger’s syndrome. These can wreak havoc in the classroom. There is an enviroment in which children who suffer from these conditions can excel. It is a matter of finding the right educational setting.
6. Don’t be tempted to look beyond your child’s behavior or kid yourself into thinking that they are a model student. You may feel like defending your child and think that everyone is wrong about his behavior. It is more productive to acknowledge that there could be a problem and work it out with help from the LEA.
Those are just some of the issues you may have to deal with, so be prepared for them.
The previous tips should be of some assistance to any parent struggling with a child’s behavior. Plus, if you work in the education field please refrain from pointing to kicking the child out of the classroom as the only solution. That would not be a solution and wouldn’t be of benefit to anyone.