We do not know how much time is left for us or for others. It is important to express to others now what we wish to say, before it is too late. If a loved one dies with unresolved issues between us or if words of love have not been expressed, it may disturb our peace of mind and leave us in a lot of pain. On the other hand, if we say what we feel needs to be said, whether asking for forgiveness, expressing our love and appreciation, or acknowledging the other person’s impact on our lives, we are left with a sense of completion and closure. We may grieve the loss of that person in our lives, but there can also be a sense of peace with the pain.
My father died three days before Father’s day in 1994. He and our family knew that he was dying. I had the opportunity to let him know verbally and in writing the many ways that he positively affected my life. When he died, there was a sense of completion. I had a flight booked to go see him on Father’s Day weekend. Three days before that weekend as I was dressing for work, my intuition urged me to go immediately and not to wait for the weekend. Fortunately, I listened to the inner guidance, jumped in my car, and drove the three-hour trip to be with my father. I had the opportunity to be with him for the last three hours of his life. One of my hands was on his chest when he died. I saw him take his last breath and felt the life go out of his body. What remained was an empty shell and it was obvious that he, the soul, was gone.
I had often heard the expression, “One moment we are here and the next moment we are gone.”‘ I actually experienced this, because one moment I felt life in the body of my father, and in the next second he departed and there was no life. For some time after this experience, I would find myself looking deeply into each person’s eyes with realization that in a moment one of us could be gone. It impressed upon my mind that only now, in this moment while we are alive, can we relate to one another. Now is the time to say what we want to communicate to others. In the present moment, we are capable of embracing each other verbally, physically, or visually.
The awareness that we will die one day can serve as a catalyst for living life more fully, for connecting with the deepest part of ourselves and others, and for making the best possible use of the time which remains.
Copyright 2007. Raymond Gerson