Expectations are important in life as they form the foundation of our conduct and behavior. Parents have expectations that form a vague picture of what their children should grow up to be. These expectations are formed unconsciously from our own wants and desires.
As parents, you have to pause and evaluate your expectations from your children once in a while to see if they are reasonable or not. It is, of course, very difficult to come to any definite conclusion about them, but you must try to have positive and reasonable expectations otherwise there will be frustration for all concerned.
It helps to read books, do some research and educate yourself about what to expect from your child at every stage. These books are written by experts and experienced parents. They will help you get a fair idea of what to expect.
When you decide whether an expectation you have for you child is reasonable, you have to be as objective as possible. Look into what the established child behavior guidelines are for your child’s age. If the established guideline is that children don’t develop full sentence speech till they are at least a year old, expecting a full sentence out of your six-month old isn’t a responsible expectation.
If you know your child is doing his or her best in school, and they are an average student, expecting average grade work is reasonable because they are doing their best and you know it’s their best. Child behavior expectations take a bit of common sense. And it is important to establish reasonable expectations of your children.
Remember, unreasonable expectations lead to disappointment. You can save yourself a lot of frustration if you keep your expectations reasonable. Unreasonable expectations can damage the self-esteem of the child irreparably. So, be very conscious of what you expect your child do; he may not be able to measure up to some of your expectations.
It is equally important to convey your reasonable expectation in child behavior to your child. You can formulate a set of goals in different areas of child discipline, and hold to them. Make sure to reward your children for meeting those expectations and encourage them to reach more, once they’ve reached one.
The key to parenting is to remember not to push your desires onto your children. It often happens that parents impose their own unfulfilled dreams on their children and expect them to achieve what they failed to do in their lifetime. Nothing can be worse than this. So, take some time out and look at your expectations and assess how reasonable they are. Reasonable expectations promote growth and positive self image and are an essential parenting skill.
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