Bloom where you are planted- Motherly Advice to my children – Building Self Confidence/Self Esteem

Bloom where you are planted. What does that mean? To me, it means that no matter where you are in life, you should make the best of it. Of course, there are always exceptions to that rule, but generally making the best of the situations or circumstances of where you are in life, is great advice. It is also a great way to increase your self esteem and self confidence.

I always tell my kids, that no matter what you are doing, you need to always do the best job and the best work you can. For instance, I am always telling my kids to always do the best the can, whether they are participating in a sport or doing homework. I overheard my oldest son, for instance, the other day telling his younger brothers that grades in elementary or middle school don’t count towards college acceptance. Some of the subjects they were presently learning didn’t even help them in life. My response was this. I told them that even though their grades in elementary school and middle school aren’t seen on their applications to colleges and some of the subjects they learned in school may not help them latter in life, I still wanted them to do always do the very best that they could. Even though some subjects that they are now taught in school, won’t ever be used as an adult, they were still learning something. The skills that they achieve through studying creates good studying habits (practicing on those subjects), they create the habit of always working hard and doing their best (good work ethics), and that they would build up the pride in knowing that they did their best. Knowledge also builds on knowledge. It also provides a stong foundation and stepping stone for the next class at the next level (for instance, the math skills learnt in pre-Algebra prepare them for the next level of math education or Algebra). It also teaches them good work ethics and prepares them to do well in their future vocation or jobs. It will also help them to build great character and the life skill to become successful in all that they do. They will blossom into successful adults with high self confidence and self esteem.

Lastly, the pride that they feel in doing a job well done leaves no future regrets. I know that when I have not done my best, I will sometimes second guess myself or I will regret the fact later that I didn’t do my best. I will then wish I had put more effort into it. An example is when I am having people over. I have all these plans or visions of what everything is going to look like and the food that I need to prepare, on the day of the party. Unfortunately, I don’t do my best at starting early enough and preparing for the party. When people arrive, everything is ready. My house is clean, everything is put in its place, there is minimum clutter, and the food and drinks are all arranged and ready for my guests when they come over. This avoids a last minute rush and a lot of stress. More often than not, I don’t do my best and start preparing for the party at the last minute or over commit myself with other things, and when the guest arrive, I am not ready for them. Things are hastily thrown or hidden away in some closet, I am upset with my kids for not helping me more, and my guests end up helping me get ready for my party. My stress level is high and my self confidence in pulling off a successful party is down. I continue feeling stressed for the first hour worrying of my party and worrying if everything has been done that I had planned. After the party, I realized for instance, that I forgot to make or put out the coffee or tea or something else.

In sports, I stress to my kids that no matter what team they are on, whether they like the team or not, it is a team sport. As a respect to their team, they have to always play to the best of their ability and try their best. This builds team moral as well as high self esteem and confidence knowing that no matter what the outcome of the game that they have done their best to support the team in winning. Even though their team may lose, by playing the best they can, it leaves them with a good feeling that they contributed to their team and they have no regrets.

So my advice to my kids to bloom where they are planted refers to the fact that no matter what life hands them, they need to always do the best that they can or put their best foot forward so that they don’t have regrets and will live a successful and a self confident life.