Whether youve given birth or have adopted a newborn, raising that baby is a terrific time to remember that we are all connected. Its a great time to remember that we are so much more than a physical body that we are indeed spirits living in the material world (as Stings song reminds us.) Its a terrific time to remember that there is a higher power that binds us together that guides and governs all of creation that shines through our eyes that responds to our thought and what we say about ourselves.
Indeed we are all connected on the invisible side of life. We must be. It doesnt matter if its a tree or a flower a bird, or a human being. Its all one Life Energy expressing in different forms. This awareness becomes intensified when you have a baby. It becomes so clear that your newborn is more than a cute little physical body. In those moments when your baby is awake and alert, you notice a light shining from behind her eyes and you can feel the connection soul to soul. And the first time he smiles, you know that that love could just maybe erase all the wrongs in the world.
You might also feel totally responsible for not only taking care of your babys physical needs, but also his or her emotional needs. You begin to think about the responsibility you have in shaping who he or she becomes. Yes, I know, a lot of it is nature and temperament. Ive got twins so I know first hand how different they can be even when you do the exact same things with both babies. Still, a large part of the equation is nurture. Their level of self-esteem, their social skills, their learning capacity and how they feel about themselves can all be affected by what you, as a parent (and a god in your childs eyes) do or dont do.
Thats why bonding is so important to a babys development. When a baby feels the connection with you, your unconditional love and your willingness to be fully present with him or her, a baby develops into an emotionally healthy, happy child with high self-esteem and is able to form healthy relationships with others easily.
Also, what you believe to be true about your baby, and what you say to her has an enormous impact on who she will become. One of the baby bonding activities I have in my book, The Baby Bonding Book, is to repeat affirmations for your baby. Yes, I know he or she doesnt understand the words yet. But, because were all connected, they can feel your intent, and somewhere deep inside, they get the meaning. When you repeat phrases such as, You are so beautiful and magnificent; You are perfect; You are bright and intelligent; You are so loving and generous; You are so creative and talented; its like food for your babys soul. Repeating these phrases to your baby on a regular basis is like fertilizing the ground and watering the little shoots of life in your garden. Before long theyll mature and blossom into something really magnificent.
Some of you might be saying to yourself right now, Well I can certainly do that with my baby, but I sure wish it was done to me when I was a baby. I know the feeling. Imagine what magnificent people we would be now if our parents had spent the time bonding with us completely and repeated affirmations to us like that while we were young. But we have to remember that were all human. None of us is a perfect parent. And were all doing the best we can with the understanding we have at the time. We need to forgive our parents and ourselves.
Also, we can give ourselves what our parents never did. We are beginning a new life with this new baby. We can begin a new life with ourselves as well by applying the following three ideas
1. Love yourself unconditionally. Just as you love your baby pretty much unconditionally (in other words, he cries, throws up, gets cranky, refuses to go to sleep but you still love him and think hes wonderful) you can do this for yourself. Love yourself unconditionally. Even when you blow your diet, think or say unkind things about others, file your taxes late, forget to call your mom, etc., etc., forgive yourself. Youre doing the best you can at any given moment. You have the chance to start again tomorrow. Think about how you love your baby and transfer that feeling to yourself. See yourself as a magnificent child of Infinite Love. Notice your wonderful qualities. Where are you proud of yourself? Where are you beautiful? Notice that and give yourself credit.
2. Treat yourself with kindness. Think about how you treat a new friend. Dont you tend to give them the benefit of the doubt? Wouldnt you be quick to recommend they treat themselves to something special whether its a good movie, a good book, a great restaurant, or a full-body massage? Treat yourself the same way. Act as if you were your own best friend.
3. Affirm a higher truth about yourself. Even if you are currently experiencing limitation in any area of your life, you have the capacity to rise above the experience and call forth a higher truth for your life. Even in the midst of a stressful time, a frustrating relationship, financial lack or a health issue, you can consciously connect with the abundance and harmony of the Universe and claim your good as a beloved child of the Divine. When it becomes yours in consciousness, it will become yours in experience shortly thereafter.
I go into much more detail and give you step-by-step processes for integrating these ideas (and more) into your life in my new program, the Manifesting Your Desires Platinum Program. You have the ability to totally transform how you think about yourself and what shows up in your life as a result. This special time of nurturing your baby is the perfect time nurture yourself as well. Embrace the opportunity.
Many blessings to you and your baby!